We're just a million little gods causing rainstorms, turning every good thing to rust.

I guess we'll just have to adjust.




Thursday, February 25, 2010

Through the wind and the rain
She stands hard as a stone
In a world that she can't rise above
But her dreams give her wings
And she flies to a place where she's loved
Concrete angel.

Monday, February 22, 2010

a fragile soul

My guinea pig died today. I never really liked it. But the weird part is, I cried. More than five times. We always had this whole I-hate-you-you-hate-me thing going on, but I miss it. I know, I'm rambling over a rodent, but.. I don't know. I always leave my room expecting to hear her knawing on her water dispenser or scurrying around her cage but I don't, and.. I don't like it..
My brain's automatically putting those sounds around the house now. She would sit there squeeking forever and it was weirdly comforting, as annoying as it was.
I can't help but feel guilty, too. We were never really home to regularily do things for her and it was Cory's pet, so when I was home, I expected her to do it, but she never did. I feel bad because I can't imagine the pains he must have been in in the last bit of her life..
I'm crying again. I know it's retarded, crying over a rodent and writing in your blog about it but.. it kills me.
A lot.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

red rockets flare

GAHD. I hate being anemic, short and thin skinned. Every picture I take turns out awkward considering my height, and the fact that my skin is vein-y. Seriously. I honest-to-God hope that this goes away before I turn twenty. I really do.
Moving on.
Today, I saw a lady in Subway. She had a rhinestone riddled baseball cap with an American flag pattern on it, an American flag bandana around her neck, a shit with an American flag on it. She was also wearing a red vest with blue pants. Her family, on the other hand, just had red, white and blue beads around their necks. I got the message once I saw the hat, though.
As they left, I turned around to see their truck had a full size American flag draped over their cargo. As they went to leave the parking lot, I spotted the license plate:
Texas.
Damn olympics.

but heaven knows i'm miserable

Shit.
This is the entire reason I've never really gone to parties.

Friday, February 12, 2010

let's get out of this town

Ugh.
That's all I can say: Ugh.
I can never do anything right. I make my friends mad, I make my family mad, I make my teachers mad and it gets me NOWHERE. I don't intend to, either. It's just the stupid things I do on a daily basis.
Wrote this today, though.
Enjoy. :

The dark of night was falling fast,
Under the highway overpass,
A youth, with eyes of fire and ice,
Seeing hearts as a strange device.
His brow was sad; hungry eyes beneath,
Shone bright as a dagger from its sheath.
He parted his lips and the sound that rung,
Was the accents of an unknown tongue


A melody danced through the air of the night,
Memories tumbled; nostalgic and bright.
Frigid air cuts deep into bone,
For now, he'll hold and shout alone.

Monday, February 1, 2010

somewhere over the rainbow

I've decided I'm most definitely getting a tattoo someday. See, I don't want anything huge, or tacky, or bright, or anything. Basically, what I want, is birds. Like, a flock of birds flying up my arm (1cm-2cm silhouettes), that curves around my arm to the back and onto my shoulder blade, where they disperse and stop. It's hard to describe, but I really like it.